My Identity - Communication and Connection

Good Evening Lovlies!A huge part of my identity is that I love to to communicate and connect to other people. I occasionally forget this part of me and turn inward but I have made a conscious effort to reach out to new people around me.  I want to share  a story that occurred at my usual coffee shop recently.--Frozen and windblown I walked in the back door of the Soul Full Cup with work on my mind and bags of work on my shoulders. I was unexpectedly greeted by a room full of college students and a live performer from Philly. Taken aback and aware that I wasn't going to accomplish any work related tasks, I almost turned around and walked out, but then I remembered I need to take time to enjoy life and interact with people!I squeezed through the masses, was able to score a free chamomile tea and a table right next to the singer. He had a messy guitar style, a smooth, distinct voice and a sense of humor. He played a great set and afterward I got up the nerve to ask if he’d let me buy him dinner. He said that would be great but he’s vegan so it might be difficult (I live in a small town).As he talked to the last stragglers leaving the coffee house, I frantically searched my smartphone for a vegan restaurant nearby. Luckily for me Orian was using Couchsurfing (a site where you can connect with kind souls who offer their couch to you during your travels) and his couch for the night knew of a nearby vegan restaurant – a quite fancy one at that. I spent the evening eating delicious vegan food and listening to local artists sing and play guitar on the couchsurfing’s host’s living room floor (which also happened to be a dance studio!). I had an amazing time and I am so glad that I didn't walk out of the coffee house without connecting with the great people I met that night.You can listen to Orion play "Where We're Going" below!http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qA0bzgv-Ado

 

Ted Talk -Thandie Newton: Embracing otherness, embracing myself

Today I would like to share a thought provoking Ted Talk by British Actress Thandie Newton entitled "Embracing otherness, embracing myself". Thandie speaks of living from your essence and suspending the projection of self. The projection of self is the illusion that the self is constant.

"The destruction of myself was so repetitive that I started to see a pattern. The self changed...but another one would evolve. The self was not constant."- Thandie Newton

Growing up, Thandie's projected self did not fit in among her peers and  was constantly rejected. This lead to her self destructive thoughts and feelings (anxiety, confusion and shame) until she realized that the “self” was not constant, and not real.Her quote resonates with me because I have drastically changed multiple times over the past 5 years. Evolving, growing and learning. I have immersed myself in "heady" activities: reading, studying, thinking, pondering, questioning - but as the next quote points out this might not be the best thing to do.

“If we're all living in ourselves and mistaking it for life, then we're devaluing and desensitizing life.”- Thandie Newton

Thandie encourages us to suspend the self enough to recognize we are all connected. To engage, interact with, learn from and love each other.[ted id=1193]

• When do you feel oneness? Thandie feels it while dancing (me too!) and acting. I have also felt it while hiking trails in the woods.
• Do you think the self is a projection or that it remains constant?
• Have you ever been so lost in yourself that you forget to care about others?

Emotional Intelligence Appraisal

Good Evening Lovely Readers!I have completed my Emotional Intelligence Appraisal at Talent Smart and it sure is an eye opener. The code for the appraisal comes with the Emotional Intelligence 2.0 book. The assessment is quick (~20 questions) and all it asks of you is to reflect on the situations and answer honestly.Emotional intelligence (EI) is the ability to observe, assess and manage emotions which play a vital part in how we deal with others. Emotional Intelligence 2.0's primary purpose is to increase EI by first assessing your current EI (Taking the Appraisal) and then providing proven strategies for improving your competence in areas where you may be lacking.The Appraisal assesses your personal competence and social competence vs. what you see and what you do.Personal Competence x What I See = Self AwarenessPersonal Competence x What I Do = Self ManagementSocial Competence x What I see = Social AwarenessSocial Competence x What I Do = Relationship ManagementThe Scoring is broken down as followed:90-100        A strength to capitalize on80-89           A strength to build on70-79          With a little improvement, this could be a strength60-69          Something you should work onBelow 59    A concern you must addressMy scores were not perfect but that's OK because a friend recently reminded me that we are all perfectly imperfect (so true!).The program encourages users to start Emotional Intelligence improvement with Self Awareness (Personal Competence x What I See). The following tailored-to-me strategies were suggested to improve my Self Awareness:

• Observe the ripple effect from your emotions
• Watch yourself like a hawk
• Seek feedback

In Emotional Intelligence 2.0, the ripple effect from your emotions is compared to a ripple effect from a stone swiftly dropping into water.

"Your outpourings of emotion are like stones that send ripples through the people in your life."-  Emotional Intelligence 2.0 by Travis Bradberry & Jean Greaves

Observing the ripple effect from emotions can be difficult at times for me because when I occasionally "dump emotions" on others I have a tendency to move on to the next topic, quickly forgetting about the emotion. Emotions are contagious so I need to remind myself that venting negative emotions on others can leave them feeling negative. I want to leave a positive impression on people and leave people feeling positive!Watching yourself like a hawk in the EI world is to develop a more objective understanding of your own behavior. When I get caught up in emotion it is very easy to get tunnel vision and forget to look at the situation objectively. I tend to assess situations after they occur not while they are in process. I will work toward pulling myself out of the emotion to view the whole picture "like a hawk" from above. I can do this by taking note of my behaviors and thoughts as the emotion unfolds.

"Self-awareness is the process of getting to know yourself from the inside out and the outside in. The only way to get the second, more elusive perspective is to open yourself up to feedback from others"- Emotional Intelligence 2.0 by Travis Bradberry & Jean Greaves

Seeking feedback from others to understand how I am perceived is a big risk. I do not love putting myself out there (fear is a big part of this) but for the sake of learning and growing I will be seeking true feedback from others.Emotional Intelligence is a new concept for me and I am excited to learn more by finishing the book as well as interviewing Katie Dahmen, the EI presenter I recently met, on Thursday!

Week 3: Self Identity/Self Awareness - Loving Your Current Self

The past two weeks have been dedicated to devising a proper eating, sleeping and exercising schedule, as well as establishing financial goals. This week I am focusing on Self Identity and I am very excited about it! Self Identity to me is shedding the layers from years past and breaking out of the mold that people in your life place on you depending on when they met you.High School friends, parents and college friends view you in a certain way based on your past experience together and have difficulty seeing you differently as you evolve. Self Identity is loving your current self and letting go of the past. This week will be filled with identifying ways to be OK with where I am right now and who I am right now.I was lucky enough to spend last weekend in beautiful Wilmington, Delaware at the Regional Society of Women Engineers (SWE) Conference. The very first session I attended on Saturday was about Emotional Intelligence – self awareness / identity and the awareness of how people respond to you. I was thrilled to see this session on the agenda because it fit perfectly with this week’s theme! This week I will be reading Emotional Intelligence 2.0 by Travis Bradberry & Jean Greaves as well as interviewing Katie Dahmen, the presenter at the SWE workshop I attended. I will also be creating lists of my strengths and weaknesses, completing the Emotional Intelligence Appraisal, investing in some new wardrobe items and scheduling time to reflect on how much I accomplish each day.What does self identity mean to you?

Book Review: Get a Financial Life - Personal Finance in Your Twenties and Thirties

Here's a secret: One of my hobbies is to read personal finance blogs and news postings. My favorite blogs are  Man Vs. Debt: Sell your crap, Pay off your debt, Do what you love and Daily Worth and favorite money news site is CNN Money.  I enjoy gleaning tidbits of financial information from these sites. I have made some shifts in my spending and savings habits due to these articles; however it is difficult to get all of the information relevant to me (e.g. I don't own a home nor do I have children) in one consolidated place. This is where Get a Financial Life - Personal Finance in your Twenties and Thirties by Beth Kobliner steps in.Beth Kobliner, personal finance commentator and journalist as well as a member of the President's Advisory Council on Financial Capability, wrote Get a Financial Life in 1996 and completly updated the book for the new economy in 2009. She delves into every aspect of  finance and has great resource suggestions throughout her book. She beings with identifying strategies for dealing with debt, moves on to the ins and outs of investing, discusses buying a home and insurance policies and finally tax strategies.You can read the first chapter of her book here which is a cheat-sheet for the entire book. Definitely worth a look!This book holds an incredible wealth of knowledge so instead of reviewing every part I want to focus on key elements that stood out to me as well as point out tokens of information I have personally heard discussed among my peers.Key Elements that I will be Implementing:Debt Repayment Strategy

• Increase payments to my one and only credit card (pay off within 3 months)
• Use the debt snowball technique and add the credit card payment (once paid off) towards my car loan

Saving Strategy

• Call my credit card company to negotiate a lower APR
• Cut back on eating out (less Wegmans sushi and work cafe lunches for me..)
• Set up direct deposit to direct 10% of my take-home pay to my savings account (I'm building up 3-6 months worth of living expenses as an emergency fund)
• Contribute more to my 401(k) and consider opening a Roth IRA in a Socially Responsible investment category
• Take a defensive driving class to lower my auto insurance payment
• Pay at least $2,500 in interest on student loans this year (this amount can be deducted at tax time)

Insurance Strategy

• Ask my auto insurance agent about bundling in Renters Insurance
• Understand my Medical Insurance policy more fully (what exactly is covered in it?)

Resources to Comments I've heard from my friends:I've lost track of the lenders and amounts of my student loans.To locate your federal loans you can go to the National Student Loan Data System.I need to lower my student loan payments because I cannot afford them but I'm not sure how this will effect me long term. For useful calculators to determine how much more interest you will pay over the lifetime of your loan by lowering your payments now go to the U.S. Department of Education or the Smart Student Guide to Financial Aid websites.I have no idea what is on my credit report or how to find out.You are entitled to one free credit report each year. Go to Annual Credit Report to fill out the form and view your credit report. Be sure to check it for errors!To see your credit score you have to pay $16 at MyFICO. You may want to consider viewing your score if you are planning to buy a car or home soon.

Guest Blog: Financial Fun - The Envelope System

I am very excited for today's guest blog! I have always struggled with sticking to my budget so I welcome new systems with open arms. Today's guest blog is written by a quite organized Student Affairs Professional (check out her blog at College Forever!).----I have always loved being organized. As a nine year old, nothing made me happier than a freshly rearranged and reorganized room. Seeing all the organizational products at Ikea sets my heart a-flutter. Yes, this might make me seem like a weirdo, but at least I'm a well organized weirdo!Something that needed a major overhaul when I got my first big girl job was my bank account. Even though I had this job that paid me (slightly) more money than I earned as a grad student, I had no idea where it was going. Payday would come and go and I was just as broke as I was the week before. I started by asking my friends how they kept track of money. Word of warning to my student affairs friends out there, do not ask this question to any of your friends that are engineers. The answer will just make you feel bad about every life decision you have made that got you to a job you love with a paycheck you hate. From my friends, I heard about things like mint.com and having portions of your paycheck automatically deposit into certain accounts. I also tried looking things up online but had trouble finding anything that pertained to me. Mortgage? Child care? These are not concerns of mine at the moment. Finally, I heard about the "envelope system".What is the "envelope system"? Well, to start with, I don't know if it had a fancy name, this is just what I heard it referred to as so that's what I'm going to call it. Sorry if you are the inventor of the envelope system and are offended that I am not calling it by it's proper name. I would tell you to sue me, but I don't have a lawsuit envelope set aside....back to my original point! The envelope system allows you to create a budget with multiple categories that limits your spending.I'll walk you through step-by-step of how I set up my system. The very first thing I did was make a list of the things that I know I have to pay for every month that I can't or don't use cash for. This might include your rent, loan payments, utility bills, and prescription medications...ladies, I'm looking at you. Birth control isn't free yet! Subtract the cost of all of these things from your paycheck. If you already funnel some of that paycheck into savings, you're going to want to subtract that money too. What you have left is what you're going to work with for the rest of your budget.Next, make a list of the things you normally spend money on. This might include food, clothes, gas, entertainment...that's the best part of this - you can completely set it up for the things YOU spend money on. Play Magic: The Gathering? List that as a category. The second part of this step might take you some time. How much do you tend to spend on these categories? If you've been primarily using a credit or debit card for these purchases, go back and examine previous statements to see about how much you are spending. If you don't have a way to do this, track your spending for two or three months. You could just set some arbitrary numbers for yourself, but you will probably need to do some tweaking.Once you know about how much you spend in each category per month (or have picked random numbers), total it up. This number SHOULD be less than the number we figured out earlier (paycheck minus bills). If not, you might need to make cuts from somewhere. The goal is to spend less than you make so you can save some money for things like, oh, I don't know...a trip to Disney World?Alright, so now we're going to take a category. Let's say you have budgeted $100 a month for entertainment (eating out, sporting events, movies). Divide $100 by the amount of paychecks you bring home each month. Write that number down along with the category name on an envelope. Do this for the rest of your categories with one envelope for each category. Now add those numbers up. That is the amount that you will withdraw from your account IN CASH every pay day. You will then put the money into the proper envelopes. If an envelope runs out before payday, you shouldn't buy anything else from that category.And that's it! That's the envelope system!What I like about it is that it is so flexible. I already mentioned that you get to create the categories. Another thing you can do is decide what to do with money left over at the end of a pay period. If you use all of the money from a category in a pay period, you can make the choice to take cash from another envelope...say using "entertainment" money to pay for gas or groceries (however it probably shouldn't go the other way). This is also a system that is really basic so it doesn't matter if you make $20,000 a year or $250,000 a year. It could even work with children!The one thing I stress with any organizational system is that if it doesn't work for you, don't use it. You need to be able to keep up with it otherwise you will still be unorganized. There are other ways of budgeting out there, this is just one.

Financial Rules of Thumb

As you know I am reading Get a Financial Life by Beth Kobliner this week. I've only read the first few chapters of this book and I have gotten so much out of it already!In her book she lists the following Financial Rules of Thumb:

• The Debt Target: Your debt payments (not including your mortgage) should be less than 20% of your monthly take-home pay AND the unpaid balance on your consumer debt (credit cards, car loans - not your student or home loans) should be less than 20% of your annual take-home pay
• The Housing Target: Spend no more than 30% of your monthly take-home pay on rent or mortgage payments (I am solid with this rule!)
• The Savings Target: Save at least 10% of your take-home pay each month (I do this too!)

There is room for improvement for me with the Debt Target. I recently bought a 2010 Honda Fit Sport (which was direly needed as my 2000 Chevy Cavalier was literally falling apart) which has significantly increased my debt to income ratio. I am meeting the second half of the rule which is my total unpaid balance of consumer debt is less than 20% of my annual take-home pay (go me!). Ultimately I want to pay off all of my debt - so look for a post soon about a debt repayment plan.I am meeting Beth's Housing Target. In October I moved in with my lively friend Jackie. She had just bought her beautiful house and I was lucky enough to rent out "The West Wing" as we call it. I get my own bedroom, spare room and bathroom!I am right on-par with the recommended Savings Target. I transfer exactly 10% of my income into my savings account.Budget Complete!One of my financial goals this week is to create a budget. I am proud to say that I sat down tonight and completed it!! I used a basic Microsoft excel budget template and filled in February and March expenses/income from my debit card statements. It was quite an eye opener to see how much I have been spending on tea and coffee lately! Also, slacking on bringing my own lunch to work isn't helping matters either..Completing my budget is quite exciting but it has been a challenge for me to stick with it in the past. I am looking forward to The Envelope System guest blog this Saturday!

Guest Blog: Vibrant Life Cleanse - Sleep

Honesty time: I have been suffering from insomnia for the past two months. I get anywhere from 3-5 hours of sleep per night. Prior to this bout of insomnia I would easily fall asleep and wake up after 8 or 9 hours. Last week was “Eat, SLEEP and Exercise for Your Health” and I found it extremely difficult to write a post on sleep when I am currently terrible at it.Luckily for you my close friend Irene has chosen to do a Vibrant Life Cleanse and she focused on sleep last week! She is a Freelance Writer and has written this post for us suffering with sleep issues.<3 Mae------Hello sustainable happy people!Last week I started my vibrant life journey, following the lovely Mae’s lead. I embarked in clearing out my fridge of all things unhealthy and non-real (that is, processed foods) so that I can restock it with healthy, delicious real foods. This week I emailed my supervisor to figure out how to obtain an ID so I can start to utilize the free gym membership available through my current organization. The biggest lifestyle change I started last week was a coffee/caffeinated drink cleanse! Yes, I am cutting it out for 20 weeks. This is related to the self-love area I focused on the most last week: sleep!Sleep has always been a challenge for me. In my teens I had trouble falling asleep once I was laying down, and would constantly toss and turn for sleepless, hellish hours. Now I can get into a relaxed enough state to fall asleep once in bed and under the covers. However I procrastinate, filling valuable mental, emotional and physical rejuvenation time with entertainment and relaxation. So I decided to monitor my own sleep habits by keeping an informal sleep journal. Here is an excerpt from it:Monday 2/25/13I woke up from a deep sleep and a vivid dream this morning at 7:19 am. I slept so deeply that when I woke up I thought it was a Saturday morning. I did not expect to feel so well rested, considering I fell asleep sometime between 1 and 2.I know my body was telling me to jump start this journey. It’s like it knew that I would need an extra boost this morning, to commit to a 20 week caffeinated drink cleanse and full on lifestyle shakedown.My challenge is that I try to squeeze in personal relaxation time right before bed. I have a need to spend about a half and hour or so of private, uninterrupted, quiet time to read, do internet research/blog browsing, write or just think. I know there are other factors too, like basic time management. This week I will find a library book on sleep and find out how to personalize my sleep routine to fit my needs.Tuesday 2/27/13Today I woke up even earlier—6:30 am! Today I was more tired at work than the day before. I think this is because I had the weekend to rejuvenate for Monday and a busy and stressful Monday to drain me again for Tuesday. The good news is that there was no coffee headache today. The negative effects of coffee withdrawal I am feeling are an abnormally high state of tiredness much earlier in the evening than usual. I was dead tired by 7 and I am overtly less alert. I don’t know whether to attribute this more to my lack of 8 hours, or my lack of artificial wakefulness (the coffee), but both are wreaking havoc. I WILL get more sleep tonight…Wednesday 2/28/13What I didn’t mention on Monday—because my time management was lacking—was that after work I stopped by the library around the corner from my apt. to look for sleep books. I didn’t look at the book Monday, and skimmed the chapter a little last night—not enough to report on it yet. I did notice a very impressive sleep journal in the form of a table.As for my day three of my coffee cleanse (side note: although I am avoiding coffee and other caffeinated drinks, I am not giving up chocolate, which contains some caffeine), I am still surviving! Not drinking caffeine is making me tired much earlier in the day, but it also allows me to sleep, if I don’t resist the urge to wrap myself up in blankets and disappear into dreamland as early as 9 and the desperate need to by 11. So I did in fact lay down at 11 last night and fell asleep shortly after. I woke up and let myself lie still for a while before looking at my clock, which read 7:30 am. So I estimate I got about 8 hours. It does suck to be fatigued all day pretty much after 10am, but as long as I am just caffeine-withdrawal-tired and not sleep-deprived-tired it is bearable. The former is different because, for example, it doesn’t cause me to fall asleep at my desk or in a long meeting. It just makes it harder to focus and problem solving is exhausting.I really, really hope this goes away. And now unfortunately, I don’t have time to read the sleep chapter, but I will lay down on time again because it is now 10:55 pm.Here’s to getting over humpday!Friday 3/1/13The bad news is I didn’t manage my time well enough to write last night, or to read! The good news is I went to bed close enough to my target time (11:09). Although I fell asleep after midnight, I woke up around 6:15 feeling very refreshed and awake. I managed to be somewhat productive too! Gathering my laundry that I had left in the dryer overnight, analyzing my dream, looking up my horoscope (yes, I consider these productive activities—on a different level!), editing and most importantly for this project: reading the sleep chapter! Yay! I am about a third of the way through it—and the chapter is short. My goal is to finish it and post it tonight.Welcome, Friday!Sunday 3/3/13Well, it’s been a weekend.  I ended up getting through the sleep chapter of Food and Mood—today. Here is some of the information I got out of it:There is a difference between insomnia; trouble falling asleep, and sleep deprivation; trouble getting to bed.

• A few signs of sleep deprivation:
  •  Falling asleep very quickly after you lay down
  • Drinking caffeinated beverages throughout the day to stay alert, and alcohol at night to relax
  • Having had two or more colds or viruses within the past six months

Diet and lifestyle changes are effective in improving sleep habits!Nix: coffee after 1 pm, Alcohol within two hours of bedtime, heavy meals, spicy or gas forming foods at dinner time (a few gas formers you may not have thought of include: broccoli, cantaloupe, corn, cucumbers, onions, and watermelon)Try:-Tryptophan, “nature’s sleeping pill,” which is an amino acid, and a building block for serotonin, a chemical in the brain. Serotonin’s effects include increasing pain tolerance, reducing insomnia, and even relieve mild depression.  It is available as a supplement, or you can self-regulate your natural tryptophan level by eating a high-carb, low protein snack one or two hours before bedtime. To be effective this must be done in the evening, as during the day an enzyme is produced that counteracts tryptophan’s effects.-Eating to sleep: One example- Consume a carb-rich, low protein snack an hour or two before bedHowever make these changes gradually: strict dieting or drastic changes in eating habits can disrupt sleep patterns as well.- Sleep journal

• Food and Mood has a great Sleep Journal in the form of a table. Each column is a day of the week, and rows are aligned with a list of daytime habits and by sleep habits.
•  Daytime habits to track include: amount of caffeine and alcohol consumed, amount and type of exercise, stress level and source, and moods.
• Sleep habits to track include: details about the time and duration of sleeping, thoughts and emotions surrounding sleeping, frequency of waking, and alertness after sleeping).

I learned a lot last week, and so far this week I have had two out of three good nights of sleep—Monday night I only got two hours, but I was able to pin point why: I was stressed and excited about work and ideas for week two of the vibrant life cleanse. What I could have done better was to get up and out of bed, as the sleep literature suggests, and read or write. I could have written down the causes of my work stresses, and possible solutions, I could have planned, I could have edited this post sooner… you get my drift.What I have learned is that I can take control of my sleep habits by becoming aware of the bad ones and their causes and finding solutions that work for me. My personal sleep plan, which I will continue to improve upon, is:

• No caffeine (*except chocolate*)!
• Lay down by 11 o’ clock pm
• No computer after 10:30 pm
• Read more before bed, when possible
• No proteins, alcohol, or spicy foods within two hours of bedtime
• Be aware of the amount of liquid I drink before bedtime
• Wind down by writing when stressed (in my ideal sustainable happy life, I will make time to write a lot more!)

You can find out more about all of these tips and more tools to track and improve your sleep habits in Food and Mood by Elizabeth Somer.For more information on the topic of sleep, please refer to:The National Sleep Foundation: http://www.sleepfoundation.org/GetSleep, a project of the Harvard Medical School Division of Sleep Medicine: http://healthysleep.med.harvard.edu/need-sleep/Sleep Disorders Information from the National Institutes of Health: http://www.nhlbi.nih.gov/health/public/sleep/Do you have any challenges surrounding sleep? If so what are they? If not, please share your insights and sleep secrets. I hope everyone sleeps well tonight!-Irene

Tools for Financial Success

First I would like to begin by stating my financial goals for this week.

• Create a budget and stick with it
• Interview a financial advisor to determine a long term financial plan for myself - I will report back on the juicy knowledge I attain
• Implement The Envelope System (which will be discussed in a guest blog this week!)

I am using a whiteboard to remind me of my financial priorities. I find that keeping visual reminders of my goals keeps me focused. It keeps my head in the game - especially with topics, such as finance, that I find to be dry and boring.I will also be adding these goals to the tracking spreadsheet I created to determine how well I stay on track.Now to today's topic - Tools for Financial Success.Financial success begins when the correct tools are used in your financial planning. The backbone to financial planning is your budget. I know this may seem like a daunting task but trust me, once it's complete you will have a full understanding of where you can cut back and free up money for your big dreams (such as travel or buying a home).Here is Founder of Man Vs. Debt Adam Baker's motivating story of turning his financial life around:[vimeo 56944456 w=400 h=300]An online tracker to consider using is Mint. Mint is a personal finance tracking system and allows you to categorize your expenses, track your financial goals and create great charts and graphs. The system is quite easy to set up and use!Dave Ramsey is a financial guru and offers free downloadable budget forms if you are more of a pen and paper person. He also has a ton of financial strategy information, such as the Debt Snowball Plan, to become debt free.There are also free Microsoft budget templates for you to use.The main tool you will use to turn your financial life around is discovering your passion and your personal "Big Why". Why do you want to save money? What are your goals? Do you want to travel the world? Start a small business? Buy a home? Once you figure out your Big Why, I encourage you to create a header at the top of your budget sheet that states why financial planning is important to you. Bring life to your Big Why!

Self Love Week 2: Financial Fun!

This week's focus is going to be a fun one. Learning financial basics in your 20's and 30's! I will be interviewing a financial adviser, scouring online financial articles and reading this week's book "Get a Financial Life - Personal Finance in your Twenties and Thirties by Beth Kobliner.Building a solid financial foundation, goals and plan is essential to self love for two reasons:

• Alleviate money worries - freeing up mental space for enjoying life
• Free up money for your really important financial and life goals (i.e. Travel, Buying a Home, Freeing yourself from debt)

I will delve into building a budget, debt reduction plan, emergency savings and savings for life goals.For now I want you to pick up a small notebook (pick one that inspires you with your favorite colors/designs) and carry it with you at all times. This is where you will keep your financial journal for a minimum of 1 month. This will show you where you are spending your money and maybe encourage you to think twice before you drop 5 more dollars on your daily latte.<3Mae

Book Review: The Beauty Detox Solution

The Beauty Detox Solution by Nutritionist Kimberly Snyder  was the book haphazardly chosen by yours truly at the local bookstore last Sunday afternoon. It stood out to me at first because it was a vibrant green book with the subtitle “Eat Your Way to Radiant Skin, Renewed Energy and the Body You’ve Always Wanted”. “Renewed Energy” was exactly what I needed.So I bought a copy and began reading it an hour or two at a time before bed – a good way to wind down for the night. I expected to hear a lot of the same old words about eating less processed foods, counting calories and nixing caffeine, as well as eating a more balanced diet with fruits, vegetables, meats and dairy (See this post about the new USDA chart).However The Beauty Detox Solution delivered a different perspective entirely. Instead of counting calories and carbs, Kimberly offers to the reader the thought that more energy equals more beauty. In her book she discusses that the process of digestion is the most energy intensive process of the body. If we can efficiently digest our food we will have more energy to renew cells, i.e. improved skin, luxurious hair. Improving digestion also decreases bloating and the “poofy” stomach problem that can occur after a heavy meal.http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YMS4CF9OxXMKimberly offered two ideas for optimizing digestion and freeing up energy. Food pairing and eating meals from light to heavy .Food pairing is based on the idea that different enzymes are produced to digest fats, starches and proteins. Optimal digestion works when we follow the beauty pairing guidelines listed below:Beauty Food Pairing Cheat Sheet:

• Starches DO mix with vegetables
• Proteins DO mix with vegetables
• Proteins and starches DO NOT mix
• Different Starches DO mix
• Different Proteins DO NOT mix
• Fats DO NOT mix well with protein; pair moderately
• Fats DO mix with starches
• Fruits should be eaten on an empty stomach
• Fruit DOES mix with raw greens (except melons)

For more information on food pairing see Kimberly Snyder’s blog.Eating Light to Heavy is the second new concept introduced to me from this book. Kimberly gives a great analogy between a traffic jam on the highway and a traffic jam in our intestines. Imagine a Porsche, a Land Rover and a sixteen-wheel truck on a road. If the vehicles are in line (Porsche, Land Rover, Truck) there would not be a traffic jam but if the sixteen-wheel truck is in front, no one is going anywhere. The Porsche is representative of fruits and vegetables, the Land Rover of starches and the sixteen-wheel truck is protein. She suggests always consuming foods in the light to heavy order for optimal digestion and energy levels. See The Science Behind Eating Light to Heavy on Kimberly’s site.The Beauty Detox Solution is broken down into three phases: Blossoming Beauty, Radiant Beauty and True Beauty. I will be testing out the Blossoming Beauty phase for one month to see if I personally experience any change. I am hopeful and will be updating you on my progress with the program each Sunday. If you would like to start a detox and learn the basic rules of her program check out The One Day Cleanse.

Farmer's Market Fun

Last week at the Farmer’s Market, I groggily walked in and stood awkwardly in the doorway because I was a little early. I wasn’t feeling quite like my happy, bubbly self – until a little old woman cheerfully shouted “Come over here darling and try this lotion!”. She wasn’t selling the lotion – she was a customer, along with her doting husband.She took my hand and inspected it closely and agreed that they were quite dry and somewhat scaly (yes, I suffer from extremely, dry winter skin). She immediately applied a dollop of homemade lotion and instructed me to rub it in. While I was soothing my hands with the oil based lotion she patted my back and with a soulful grin said “We girls need to stick together! Even though I could be your grandma, we are soul sisters!”I was filled with warmth, a genuine happiness, and a feeling of true connection to this woman. Amazing things can happen when you put down technology and open yourself up to the people of the world.

Lively Local Food

Sustainable Happy Life is a holistic lifestyle in which daily choices lead to a happier self and more sustainable world. The following two, very important, daily choices we make dictate how we feel during any given day: eating lively, local food and connecting with lively, happy people (the best happens to be when you combine the two!).Today I want to focus on organic fruits and vegetables. The USDA recommends half of your food intake be fruits and vegetables. They came out with this nifty new plate design in 2011 for their Choose My Plate initiative to suggest percentages of food groups that should be eaten. Fruits and vegetables are essential to your health and are awesome to cook and delicious to eat (coming from a woman who would pick around pieces of onion in her pasta sauce 6 months ago-but I digress).I want to recommend buying organic, local fruits and vegetables for two main reasons:1. Less chemicals in your diet and2. You are supporting local farmers.Attending farmer’s markets is a great pleasure I look forward to every other Saturday in my town. It is fun to discuss where the person’s farm is located and what their specialties are. Some create their own lotions/lip balms/ candles while others knit hats along with raising animals and planting/harvesting vegetables.I love discussing recipes and different ways of cooking the foods and the farmers are more than happy to give tips and tricks! Buying a product directly from someone you meet and get to know gives a feeling of happiness and camaraderie as well as trust in the product- in this case the food we put in our bodies. When you buy carrots and winter squashes from a local farmer you know how far the food has traveled (significantly reducing air emissions from tractor trailers) and you can picture the farmer working in their field to produce this food for you. It brings a sense of connection to the food which is the first step to fundamentally changing your diet. Understanding where the food comes from and how it was produced helps you to analyze if it is good for your body or not.It is a lively event and it brightens my day every time I attend.

Mark Bittman: What's wrong with what we eat

New York Times food writer Mark Bittman discusses what's wrong with the way we, as a western culture, eat now. This includes too much meat, too few plants, too much fast food, and too little home cooking. He relates our current eating culture to the impact it has on the entire planet.[ted id=263]

Tools for Eating and Sleeping Well

Tuesdays are reserved to discuss the tools, tips and techniques I'm using for the topic of the week.The first tool I'm using is this project tracking spreadsheet. It's an accountability tool I use to keep myself honest about my progress. It is easy to think that I am staying on track but this easily visually shows me if I am or not. I invite you to use this spreadsheet or any other method you may have to track your progress.For my food goal I recently bought a NutriBullet to make green smoothies! I am extremely excited about it. The health benefits of fruits and vegetables are well known and green smoothies, which include both, are a fantastic way to ensure you are getting enough of them (Bonus: they're delicious).To sleep better, it was suggested to me to get a sunlamp. I have not purchased one yet, but you may want to. I currently use this Sleep Cycle App to track my sleep. I enjoy the easy wake up sound it produces in the morning and you can set a 30 minute wake-up range.I hope these tools get you thinking about tools you can use on your 20-week emotional cleanse journey. If you have any other healthy eating, sleeping or exercising tools,tips or techniques let me know!

Eating, Sleeping and Exercising for Energy and Health

Book of the Week: The Beauty Detox Solution by Kimberly Snyder, C.N.Song of the Day: Alicia Keys - Superwoman

"When we learn to eat properly, we begin to rebuild our bodies and to fulfill our purpose on this planet: to grow in health, creativity, wisdom and compassion"- Dr. Ann Wigmore

The first topic of our Self Love theme is Eating, Sleeping and Exercising for Energy and Health. The first step to build a strong foundation of self-love is to form healthy eating, sleeping and exercising habits. I know I feel better when I eat real foods thanks to the 10 Day Real Food Challenge I took from January 7 - 16.  I had more energy, I felt full longer, I craved broccoli and peanut butter/apple snacks instead of cheddar popcorn and Snickers. The experience was wonderful and starting today I will be following the Real Food Rules again :)Sleep is essential to proper functioning in life. According to the National Heart, Lung and Blood Institute, both the quantity and quality of sleep is important and helps ensure clear thinking, a better mood and better health. The odd part is that I still do not know my optimum amount of sleep. Sometimes I feel exhausted after 8 hours of sleep, but perfectly fine after 6.Exercise is an important element to health and should be done for at least 30 minutes, 3 times per week. I found this list of moderate-intensity physical activities to be informative. Exercising is a bit tricky for me right now because I have a knee injury and have to stay off of it for the next –you guessed it – 20 weeks. My doctor did give me the OK  to do low impact yoga so I began this past Saturday.Week 1 GoalsTo begin my 20 week program I will need ENERGY and POSITIVITY. These things are hard to come by without a routine of healthy eating, sleeping and exercising. So I am beginning today.My main goals for this week are:

• Eat “real” foods (real food challenge) with the exception of dark chocolate which I can eat in moderation (yay antioxidants!)
• Get out of bed when I wake up – Do not hit snooze!
• 30 minutes of yoga 3 times per week (minimum)

20-week Vibrant Life Cleanse goals to consider for yourselfEating

• Replace one unhealthy snack per day with a healthy snack such as fruit/vegetables/nuts
• Replace one unhealthy drink per day (soda pop, energy drink) with a tall glass of refreshing water
• Eat whole grain bread or brownrice instead of white bread/rice
• Cook yourself one meal per day instead of grabbing fast food (yay saving $)

Sleeping

• Implement a relaxing nighttime routine – sans electronics (Bonus! This include a warm bath and reading)
• Plan an exciting reason to get out of bed in the morning and literally jump out of bed and leave the room. Get on with your happy life!
• Ensure your room is dark and cool – this will enable your body to relax and rest

Exercising

• Try a personal trainer (I loved mine – she kept me motivated and accountable)
• Go for a 20 minute walk every day
• Get a pedometer and aim for 10,000 steps a day – The magic number to keep you from gaining weight.

A 20-week Vibrant Life Cleanse Project will be more manageable built on a sturdy base of healthy real foods, proper sleep and the release of regular exercise. I encourage you to make time for yourself to implement one or two health goals this week. Feel free to use this spreadsheet to keep track of your progress.I will be posting words of encouragement, in-depth information on healthy habits and silly motivational songs throughout the week. Good luck lovelies!

Hello and Welcome!

Do you feel stuck - like you're hitting a wall? Do you want to move forward but aren’t sure how?I have developed a program with practical techniques and information for you to start using in your daily life, now.  During the next 20 weeks, I will be exploring topics such as accepting your current self, forgiveness techniques, improving communication, and  letting go of perfection.What is a Vibrant Life Cleanse?A Vibrant Life Cleanse is a deep introspective look into your relationship with yourself. We will delve into what it means to love yourself, how to forgive and let go of emotional and physical baggage, how to forge new connections and strengthen relationships, and how to move forward and create the space to accomplish what your heart has always wanted you to do.Learning By DoingFollow me on my journey while I actively use tools, knowledge and information I have gathered over the past 5 years. I have done a ton of soul searching through reading, opening myself up enough to hear insights from others who have struggled with similar issues, and talking with life coaches. I have a ton of information to implement in my life and to share with you.  I will also conduct and post interviews with professional women who have inspired me and have taught me throughout the years.Logistics of Vibrant Life CleanseMy Vibrant Life Cleanse will be 20 weeks - 4 overarching themes (Self Love, Letting Go, Connection and Relationships and Moving Forward) with 5 specific topics relating to each theme. Feel free to cultivate your own cleanse timeline based on any of the ideas and concepts presented. This is for you to be your best self!I hope my journey inspires you to live a sustainable happy life by identifying with and loving yourself, letting go of whatever is holding you back and allowing yourself to enjoy this beautiful gift we call life.Let’s get started!Mae